Children usually are in a constant stage of exploring. A crawling baby has no fear of an insect and does not associate anything with threat. Just as we teach them to caution or look out for danger, the same way behavior is also learnt. As parents it is our duty to do a self check and discipline ourselves. Though there are no rules as to how to parent a child, the child teaches us to control our language, expressions and also outbursts. Many times children are often under peer pressure in the school bus, in the new tuition classes or also at the play ground.
Their natural tendency is to succumb to pressure or violate. So when they come home and experience a similar emotional threatening like, ‘Do your homework’ or ‘ Stop that’ their instinctive reaction is to go against our wishes. Many times we say to our kids, ‘I want this now’ which requires to be changed to ‘Can you do this for me’. ‘Please put the book back’ or ‘help me with the dishes’ brings out the best out of children.
Insist on discipline and allow relaxed time lines on weekends or only long holiday. Communicate early to children with eye gestures and teach them manners. Ultimately they are children and actually believe in logic. It is often noticed that kids get used to a particular routine and similarly also adjust to a behavior. If a parent tries to helicopter a teenage child then the natural reaction is cold behavior. This has deep psychosis on the behavior in the social circle.
Kids are great mimics and will mimic good and bad behavior. They notice how we handle life and get disturbed when we yell at delays, the helper or express impatience while waiting in a queue. Patience is learnt when you wait for your turn and take this time to causally chat with your child. Make them respect elders and express ‘thank you’ to the ice cream vendor and to the helper at school. Love teaches them to express positively and assure them they are loved at all times.